Monday, March 23, 2009

Farewell, Facebook. I'll miss ya.

There ARE people in the world who can utilize fun sites like Facebook without wasting enormous amounts of time lurking there waiting for updates on friends' pet hamsters.

These are likely the same people who can keep a whole package of Oreos in their pantry for up to a week...

...who can divide reading time into neat little half-hour segments, rather than devouring an entire novel in seventeen straight hours to the detriment of their marriage, children, and housekeeping...

...who approach exercise, discipleship, career, motherhood, friendship, and hobbies with a "step by step", not overly-analytical, take-it-as-it-comes mentality.

As you may or may not know, I am NOT one of those people. Case in point, I have compulsively checked my facebook page nearly every day since I joined, refreshing the sucker up to a dozen times a day, anxious for news from people who may or may not really be interested in hearing mine.

It has been fun, if tiring. I've learned all sorts of unnecessary tidbits about the lives of friends from California to Kenya. I reunited with one old college friend, and chatted with a long-ago acquaintance from high school.

Overall, though, it is pseudo-community (to use Kevin's word) and mostly it leaves me lonely. A while back, I considered "deactivating" my account when my former mother-in-law put in a friendship request - my resultant heart rate was unhealthy, to say the least. My reason for staying was that I had some wonderful family members in Pennsylvania and Germany and Idaho and Ecuador that it was fun to be "in touch" with. Problem is, I realized that just having their kind faces in the "friend" box didn't really mean we were in touch. This may be the way it is in 2009, but it isn't good enough for me. I suppose I'm putting myself in a rickety rocking chair on an imaginary front porch, complaining about the way the world has turned, but I'd rather have real communication with these people. And facebook can't give it to me (except with a few people that one could argue I'd talk to anyway one way or another). Because of those few people, I'm sad to say goodbye and I hope we find each other in real life somehow.



littlecbsmom said...

I totally agree with you and that was so well put. I don't actually use it to well, but it can be a good tool for just getting back in touch with someone. After that....let's blog, e-mail or heck pick up the phone!

Oh yah....I bought some vanilla oreos tonight at the grocery store...wonder how long they will last!

heather said...

we are so similar that i am actually a bit frightened. for some crazy reason, my computer will not let me see my FB account so i can only read what people are writing to me through my email but i cannot is amazing how much time this has freed up!

i have not read a novel in more than 3 months because my family and house is still recovering from the last one.....

i have not bought OREOS since i found out i was pregnant with Emilie (4 yrs ago)....because i have serious self control issues....

i could go on... :)

Home Sweet Home said...

Very well said. I think you are making wise healthy choices. I agree with what you had to say. I am not one who has to check it every day and go weeks without, but then wonder why do I need it? I may follow in your footsteps soon...we will see.

Diva Mom Vicki said...

I went through a learning curve with facebook. First, the excitement of seeing my friend count rise like a rocket. Then, the realization that there is a good reason why I hadn't kept in touch with so many people from my past (especially during the election cycle - wow, was that ugly). So I dialed it back, unfriended a lot of people (all of whom probably never even knew I was gone as they never 'chatted' with me) and as of Lent only allow myself to check it when Dan is home engaging the boyz - 'cause facebook can be a serious time drain!

I like the immediacy of reading what my friends have been doing today - the mundane, simple things that they would never blog about (if they blog at all, which most of my friends don't).

I also like the networking aspect. I just hooked up a prolifer in HI with my FIL, who is the Director of the Blue Army (Fatima). She wanted to get a Chapter running in her state and I put the two of them in touch.

Like anything, moderation and prioritizing - and sometimes prioritizing means making it not a priority at all! Excellent job realizing your limits!

(But I'll miss your updates on facebook!)

Jelaine Faunce said...

You're welcome to email any time you want to do lunch at the park or would like me to watch as the little ones throw glass bottles in Whole Foods. ;o)

P.S. I had a whole box of Scottish shortbread cookies in my pantry (since Christmas) until 2 weeks ago when my hubby decided to eat them all in one night.