Monday, December 20, 2010

Wreaths - A Neighborhood Photo Essay

From my vast research, conducted over the past five minutes, wreaths are a Christian symbol of the coming of Christ. We have advent wreaths, we hang them on our doors, and occasionally, if we dress up like Julius Caesar, we wear them on our heads.

All around my neighborhood, there are marvelous displays of Christmas lights and inflatable snowmen. But I wanted to give special attention today to the Christmas wreath. Enjoy!

First, when deciding whether to adorn your door with a wreath, you must make a decision about size and number. This is easy if you have a single door. Single door=single wreath. Easy!

Perhaps, though, you have double doors. Now the possibilities are more numerous. But logic dictates that double doors=double wreaths.

Logic isn't the main factor in decorating, however. Maybe you moved from a single-door house to a double-door house this year, and you just don't have the time or money to go purchase an additional wreath. That's okay. Plenty of people hang a single wreath even with two doors. No one will judge you.

For some personalities however, the two door, one wreath option seems out of whack. Looking at it makes you a tiny bit cockeyed. There's an easy solution. Center the wreath between the two doors! You'll be so avant-garde!

And speaking of centering --- and avant-garde --- who says the wreath must be positioned towards the top of the door? No one! Go ahead and center that sucker however you like!

For that matter, center-shmenter! Put 'em wherever you darn well please! When you're already stressed out about the in-laws coming to visit, convention be damned!

There is some significance to the circular shape of the wreath. It represents eternity. But if you're feeling less immortal, go with square. And again, don't be confined to the somewhat stifling rules of spatial arrangement.

Furthermore, not everyone feels comfortable with a wreath. Why not try bows?


In my neighborhood, the prize for most wreaths on one house? Eight. They hang on doors, lights, stucco popouts, and... windows. Like so.

Conversation overheard at Monty's Custom Wreath Shop: "I don't care if it isn't evergreen. Just so the bows match my shutters."

For the photo-essayist, nothing escapes the eye. Hence, I think I figured out who stole the wreath off of the above house last year... these guys! (Look closely. You can just make out the teal-green bow.)
(I'm wondering who the Santa frog used to belong to. In my opinion, they're better off without it.)

Here we have a classic case of an individual wanting to embrace the Christmas season, but hesitant to leave behind the Autumn gourd and all of its beauty.

"Crap, Sheila! I'm losing my mind. Go check whether I hung the wreath by the fireplace."

Sad but true: If you opt for the 3,700 square-foot house, you might have to settle for a smaller, less expensive wreath for a few Christmases.

Finally, this house gets my "Prettiest Wreaths" award. And even though they belong to my friends Derryck and Kelly, I swear I'm not biased.

These photos were taken in my neighborhood today, December 20, 2010. All photos are mine. So is the humor. Feel free to use the decorating ideas, though!
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