Friday, July 4, 2014

Merry Fourth!


I've often said the Fourth of July is my favorite holiday because it is so low-maintenance. Holidays like Christmas and New Years have so much build-up and so many high expectations they are difficult to survive. In order to sort out my feelings on the topic, I'm going to compare and contrast the Fourth of July with Christmas.

Fourth of July: Friends
Christmas: Family, and that includes Grandpa Lou who starts drinking shortly after dawn

Fourth of July: Fireworks
Christmas: Presents for everyone, even the bug guy and the neighbors who just moved in and Great-Aunt Elda who never wants anything but you have to get something anyway

Fourth of July: Star-Spangled Banner
Christmas: Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer

Fourth of July: Grilled meat
Christmas: Figgy pudding. Or a Turducken.

Fourth of July: Red, white, and blue matching t-shirts for the whole family
Christmas: New suits and fancy dresses for the whole family except for little Junior who refuses to wear anything but his Batman costume

Fourth of July: The Declaration of Independence
Christmas: Jesus

Fourth of July: Pinterest desserts in patriotic colors. Pinterest decorations indoors and out.
Christmas: Pinterest recipes for desserts in red and green, Pinterest crafts, Pinterest Santa treats, Pinterest ornaments, Pinterest manger scenes, Pinterest blueprints for snow forts, Pinterest holiday diets, Pinterest patterns for handmade stockings, Pinterest list of "100 Must-Keep Christmas Traditions."

Fourth of July: Sweltering heat and profuse sweating at the hometown parade
Christmas: Church

Fourth of July: Go to bed to the sounds of neighborhood incendiaries and bombs bursting in air
Christmas: Go to bed aware of either the peace and silence of falling snow or the cat romping in torn wrapping paper or Grandpa Lou passed out and snoring in the hallway
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