Monday, September 10, 2012

Early Onset Alzheimer's and One Night in Baker

Taking my cue from Layla and her efforts against early onset Alzheimer's worries, I will write about my own fears and thereby dispel them, immediately. Good plan?
I, too, have a fear of Alzheimer's. I've lost two close relatives to the disease, though they didn't have early onset. Uncle Don made it look alright, (though I know it wasn't)- singing "Home on the Range," to the nursing home staff. Grandma didn't sing so much. Aunt Laura told us all, "Don't use anti-perspirant. The aluminum contributes to Alzheimer's." I've tried. But then I stink. It's the true sign of skewed priorities when memory loss is favorable to stinky pits.

Other items on my "fears and worries" list include: being sentenced to prison; having to spend a night in a motel in Baker, California; and walking a dog while riding a bike. Let's take them one at a time.

1) Being sentenced to prison. I think reason dictates that we all be afraid of this. Keeps us on the straight and narrow. My actual fear is that I'll be wrongly accused of something and have to go innocent to the slammer. One wonders how a suburban housewife could fear being wrongly accused of something serious enough to earn prison time. Well, maybe one is not watching enough TV.

2) Having to spend a night in a motel in Baker, California. This one's a doozy. Every time I drive through that town (and it happens often), I shudder at the thought that I'd get stranded there. Baker is not even a real town - there's no library, churches, or town hall. I think it's an overgrown rest stop. And I puzzle continually about where the local restaurant employees live. I'd do research, but I'm too creeped out about what I might find.

3) Walking a dog while riding a bike. Frankly, I'm surprised we don't hear about more fatalities resulting from this dangerous practice. In a park recently, I saw a guy riding a bike around and around for an hour, talking on his cell phone beside his dog trotting on a leash. As far as I know, they went home alive, but it made me cringe. That particular park is chock-full of rabbits. All it would take for disaster is for that dog to spot a rabbit, bolt off after it, and next thing you know you've got a mangled mess of dog, rabbit, bike, cell phone, and cyclist. My safety tip is this: walk the dog. THEN go for a bike ride. THEN have your cell phone conversation. Furthermore, I saw the guy enough to overhear that he was talking about real-estate finance. Not just fluff. With all that brain-power engaged in a significant conversation, he was asking for trouble. But I know my safety tip will fall on deaf ears. There are people far more worried than I am about things like driving actual automobiles and cell phone use - they're passing laws about it! And people still don't listen. Beefing up the laws on bike use/dog trotting/cell phone use is still years away. In the meantime, at least it has helped me to talk about it with you.
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